Fashion is an outward expression of who we are, what we want to tell the world about ourselves. Our home does the same thing. A little more privately perhaps, but for those that we do welcome into our homes, we want them to get a little snapshot into our soul.
I went to a wedding once (a LONG time ago) and I wore a black hat with a feather in it. I was in a mood. I remember a girl came up to me and said, "I wanted to meet the girl wearing the feathered hat." We became fast friends based on what I was projecting.
Who are we? How do we feel about ourselves? What do we value? There are stories in our stuff.
I was talking to a woman recently who was having trouble letting go of her (adult) children's things. The girls had long moved out, but their rooms remained as if they had just walked out the door for the day. "What is keeping you from making changes?" I asked. Knowing full well the answer, I waited for her to say it. It took some time, but eventually she got there.
"Who would I be if I wasn't these girls' mom?" She asked. "You'd still be you and you'll always be their mom," I said. Her identity was so wrapped up in her children and raising them, she didn't know what to do with her next chapter. She didn't even realize there was a next chapter. If she kept the rooms like shrines to that part of her life, she felt like she didn't have to face defining that next chapter. What a disservice she was doing to herself! Time for a change. "Out with the old you, in with the new you!" I shouted.
Here's an opportunity to rediscover what you love, how you want to live. Who you want to be is based on nobody else's needs but your own. HOLY SHIT! That can be scary! She is going to have to dig deep, rediscover a part of herself that she put on a shelf, clear these rooms out, then decorate them for her new life, the life she wants moving forward. She can keep a few important mementos to create a lovely guest room, as the girls will return, but moving on is what it's all about.
designer Lynn Lawson |
Are you holding onto anything that no longer serves you? When you look around your home ask yourself ~ does this express who I am now? Does this express who I want to be, where I am going in life, what I am striving for, what I want to project? If the answer is no, dig deep and decorate accordingly.
#lifecoachlesson